Embracing Change and Accountability with Robert Hunt

What if accountability isn't the punishment we've all been led to believe it is? Join us as we chat with Robert Hunt, affectionately known as the "accountability guy" and co-author of "Nobody Cares Until You Do." Robert breaks down common misconceptions, revealing how accountability can actually be a source of empowerment, freedom, and hope. Through his entertaining personal stories, including his quirky talent of playing a spoon on his teeth, Robert shares how taking ownership of our choices allows us to live with intention and avoid the pitfall of victimhood.

In our conversation, we tackle the societal epidemic of neglecting personal accountability. Robert offers a candid look at how everyday excuses, like blaming traffic for tardiness, reflect a widespread victim mentality. By distinguishing between responsibility and true accountability, we delve into the importance of self-reflection on one's purpose and talents. We explore how accountability extends beyond oneself, holding a spiritual significance for those who believe they have a higher calling. This insightful discussion encourages listeners to strive for excellence in their unique roles and to fulfill the responsibilities that come with their talents.

Moving beyond theory, we explore practical steps for embracing accountability and taking action. Robert shares poignant anecdotes of overcoming personal struggles, advocating for drastic measures to eliminate negative influences and embrace change. From personal financial recovery stories to the necessity of self-accountability, he paints accountability as a courageous journey, demanding commitment and the willingness to face discomfort. Encouragement, vulnerability, and community support are highlighted as essential tools in this transformative climb, promising not just personal growth but a deeper, more fulfilling life journey.

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Chapters

• 0:15 The Power of Accountability in Life
• 13:32 The Importance of Personal Accountability
• 20:05 Embracing Accountability and Vulnerability
• 27:32 Embracing Accountability and Taking Action

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:16

Hello everyone. Hello everyone, thanks again for joining me on another episode of the Dorsey Ross Show. Today we have a special guest with us. His name is Robert Hunt.

Speaker 1: 0:28

He is described as the accountability guy and the co-author of the book Nobody Cares Until you do. He is a business owner in the Dallas-Fort Worth, texas area and helps leaders remove the things that keep them from being their best in the Dallas-Fort Worth since 2013, and he brings that experience and wisdom to his people to reach their goals. Robert has been married 25 years to his beautiful wife, kathy, and has two grown adult children, also living in Texas. He is passionate about his faith, his purpose as a family and his quest to help people be their best. Robert, thank you so much for coming on the show today. Thank you for having me Absolutely. When I just saw your email and whatnot about who you are and what you do and I was like this is an interesting guy and topic that I would like to discuss, because I don't think that we discuss being accountable to one another enough what accountability is and what does that, what does that look like?

Speaker 2: 2:02

yeah, yeah it is. It is a misunderstood word, I think most of the time we think of accountability, we think of you're in trouble and that's something you did wrong and I'm going to hold you accountable for it. It has this punitive tone that I have found in my own life. That is not accurate, because they're actually the real way we should talk about. Accountability is freedom and power and hope. And if you really think about it, if everything in your life happens to you, you're just screwed. You're just a victim in life for everything. But if, if whatever happens to you as part of the journey that directs your next step and you proactively make plans in light of the journey you're on, you own it. You own it.

Speaker 2: 2:43

Now, we all know that at the end of the day, god decides everything that happens in our lives one way or another. But if we look at the fact that we're driving and we're going somewhere and we are deciding what that looks like, we have power. But if you just wait for something else to happen to you and then complain about it, then you're just a victim, and I've lived that way for a long time as a young man, certainly even as an adult, raising my kids and the challenges I went through, it is easy to just become, in the knee-jerk reaction mindset, a whiner. But God didn't put us here and redeem us and create a plan for our life for us to sit and complain about it the whole time. There is something to be done, but we need to be the one who drive it and not sitting around and just responding to it, and that's the difference between a life that is full of accountability.

Speaker 1: 3:33

You know, as my audience knows, I like to open up my questions with an icebreaker question, and today's icebreaker question is what's something interesting about you that most people don't know?

Speaker 2: 3:50

You know I have such a twisted mind. I think of all these things in my free time. You know, like all the ridiculous things that I do, like I play the spoon on my teeth. You know I have a. When I was in high school at a talent show, I there are all these people doing real talents and I went out with a plastic spoon and played it on my teeth and it sounds like something you know, actually musical, um things that people don't know. I've been on four television shows. I grew up in Southern California and, uh, in Southern California you can just get on a TV show just walking down the street. Someone will say you want to be on a TV show. I'm like, yeah, sure, and my beautiful wife was on a couple different TV shows too, so we've been as a family. We've probably been on seven television shows together as a family.

Speaker 1: 4:32

Oh wow, Can you name a few of those?

Speaker 2: 4:35

Yeah, yeah, when I was really young I was on Family Feud with Richard Dawson as the host at the time with my family. And then, when I got married to my first wife, I was on Newlywed Game. We came in fourth place, which is known as last. That was, I guess, a foreshadowing of the future of my marriage. And then we were also on a show called Every Second Counts, which flashed in the pan. Maybe it was on for a month or so. It was horrible. And then later on in life I was on a home remodeling show called Weekend Warriors, where you remodel your home and they film it. So we've had our chance to be semi-famous. Okay, didn't do anything for my life. My life's the same. You know. It started one way. It's going to probably end the same way anyway.

Speaker 1: 5:25

How do we live a life of real accountability?

Speaker 2: 5:30

Yeah, it's not hard, it's intentional but it's not hard. And everything in life is a challenge in one way or another. You know, life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you respond to it, and if you want to have the life that you really want, you need to be intentional about it, because otherwise you become a victim and you look at your life from the lens of a victim. And so to be intentional, you have to be able to, first of all, identify what you want, and when you don't have a purpose or a vision for your life, anything works fine. But you only know what you don't want. You know people can tell you what I don't want. I don't want to be without a job. I don't want to have you know, this difficult marriage. I don't want to have bad kids. You, this difficult marriage, I don't want to have bad kids. Pick your topic. We know what we don't want. But to take the time and create the vision of what you do want, that takes thoughtfulness, that takes intentionality. But once you've done that and you actually can visualize what you want your life to be like, then you have a plan to go do something against it, and we write about this in our book that we fall into four traps that we're not really aware of most of the time, that hold us back from being accountable when you look at your life and you say here's what I want my life to be and here's where I am, and then you say, well, why am I here? I want to be there.

Speaker 2: 6:51

The four things that we tend to do that keep us as a victim is we blame, we make excuses, we say we can't, or we wait and hope. And I did all those things and I still do them sometimes, and that's why I have to always keenly be aware of what I'm doing and how I'm responding. But it's easy to blame. We can blame everything our parents, our bosses, god, the economy, the government. Or we can make excuses well, I never had this, no one told me and all these things. They just hold us back.

Speaker 2: 7:20

We can also say I can't, I can't do that, that's outside my comfort zone, which is just another word for fear. Or we can just wait and hope it gets better. Maybe I'll just make minimum payments on my credit cards for the next six years and see if things work out okay and they don't, they get worse. Or maybe I won't go see a counselor because I don't want to have awkward conversations with my spouse. So maybe it'll get better on its own. It won't, it gets worse. And so those four things hold us back as victims. But if at some point in your life you realize, look, nobody cares, nobody cares if you're broke, fat, miserable in your marriage, don't like your job, nobody cares. We got our own junk to worry about. We cannot just spend our time trying to worry about your junk. But if you care enough to do something about it, then there's the opportunity to pursue the life you really want.

Speaker 1: 8:09

What are the steps to being accountable?

Speaker 2: 8:12

Yeah, the first thing you have to do is really take stock of where you are, and we put an assessment in the book. It's called our satisfaction assessment, we came up with that term, and the whole idea is that, where you are and we put an assessment in the book. It's called our satisfaction assessment, we came up with that term, and the whole idea is that where you're satisfied, you'll have more energy in life. Where you're not satisfied, it's the opportunity to do something about it. So the first thing you do is you take stock of where you're at, and so you take the satisfaction assessment and you rank and rate where things are in your personal and professional life. You score them on a scale of one to 10. And then you look at that and you go, okay, well, I'm not happy with this or this or this. This one's not so bad, I'll get to it someday, but this one I don't like. And once you've declared that and you've been really, really honest, then you can figure out a plan to do something about it and you can be aware of the times where you fall into a trap as a victim where you'd say, well, I can't do anything about that. Yes, you can, yes, you can.

Speaker 2: 9:02

For example, let's say you have a job, you really want to pursue a career doing something. You want to be a youth minister, you want to be someone who works at a national park, I mean, whatever you think, something that doesn't make money. Youth minister there you go, someone who doesn't make a lot of money, and so then you decide, okay, I want to do that. And then you look at your life and you go well, how can I afford to be a youth pastor? Well, you can't. It doesn't pay very much in most cases. So what do you got to do to be a youth pastor? You just don't say, well, I can't, I can't afford it. No, you say, okay, I got to change my lifestyle. And then the argument I can't comes up again. Well, you can't live like that. Yes, you can. Look, I know what it's like to have no money. I mean no money. I've been there a few times in my life where I had no money and God has been faithful and he always provides in one way or another. But we get by. But you can live on very, very cheap if you want to. But it's, we don't want to. So it's, it's. If you change the word I can't to, I won't. And then you look at yourself like why am I being that way? Look, if you want to live a life that lets you chase your passion and purpose, but it doesn't pay, well, figure out a way to live cheap.

Speaker 2: 10:10

When we started our journey, we outlined this in the book. In 2019, we owed $90,000 in debt, and that did not include the house or cars, and it was a stress point for us. We argued about it. It caused stress in our lives, we were angry at God, we were angry at the world and we decided at that point we need to take ownership and change our lives. So we did. We sold our house and we finally closed escrow in March of 2020. When COVID shut down the world, we moved into this little rental home that we live in today and it's wonderful and small and lovely and clean and we take good care of it and we're thankful. But we took all that money from the sale of our house and we paid off all of our debt and started over. So don't say you can't. You could say you won't or I don't want to, but if you want the life you really want and there's something that's coming between it are you willing to change, and that's the steps of accountability.

Speaker 1: 11:05

How does accountability play in the role of people with faith? We talk about having accountability with another man. If you're a man or a woman, another woman how does faith play in that role?

Speaker 2: 11:23

I don't know how it is in other religions, but I think we may be the only one. Well, I don't know. So I just I will stop there. I know that we will be accountable to God, but there's no one else in the world that we're accountable to, and I know that's a phrase that seems odd, but in our book we tell you, you tell you, nobody can hold anyone else accountable. I cannot be accountable to you, but I can be accountable to myself and the things that I said I was going to do. You can's the point. You know you're not holding me accountable. It doesn't work that way.

Speaker 2: 12:00

But if I want to be truly accountable, I open up the opportunity for the life that I really want. And those of us who follow Jesus, we're told very clearly you will be accountable for the life you live, period, good or bad. You are truly going to be accountable to God, and that's not a threat, that's just saying so. Since you're accountable, why not live a life of intentional living that gets you the results you want? My results that I want are to live a life that shows God how thankful I am that he chose me to be a part of his family and he redeemed me for all eternity. As crappy as this world might be from time to time, it's nothing compared to an eternity spent with God, and so I look at that as okay.

Speaker 2: 12:40

So what do I do with the thing he gave me? How am I accountable to him? Since I am accountable to him, what would that look like? And that means that I honor him in my marriage, I honor him as I raise my kids, I honor him at my work and the things that I do to serve my community, because I am accountable to him, and I think that's the difference. So, when it comes to being accountable to a man or a woman, there really isn't any power in that. I know we have accountability groups, but I've been in many of them and people lie. You know, oh, how's things going? It's going great, going great. And then six months later they're finally for divorce and you're like hey, I thought things were going great, I just didn't want to talk about it.

Speaker 1: 13:33

No-transcript why are people not accountable?

Speaker 2: 13:38

I don't think they really realize they're not being accountable. You know, if I said I had a room full of people and I said who's accountable in here, everybody would raise their hand. And if I asked, well, who plays a victim role? Nobody would raise their hand. But in reality, you play the victim role all the time. When you're late for work, what do you say oh, traffic was horrible. Isn't traffic horrible every day? Is that like a brand new thing? Oh my gosh, all of a sudden there's traffic outside. There's traffic all the time.

Speaker 2: 14:05

And if you run out of time you don't get something done, you blame well, I got really busy. You make excuses. We do it all the time. These are things that are just playing us as a victim, and so I just don't think people have become aware of the life that you've started to live, because it's so pervasive everywhere in the world that when things aren't going the way you want it to go, you just blame, make excuses, say you can't, or wait and hope. And if you've got a bunch of debt, what do you do? You make minimum payments and you wait and hope things get better. Maybe I'll get a big fat bonus at work this year and that'll be used to pay off all the debt and you get a big fat bonus at work. What do you do? You go on a vacation. Well, I can make minimum payments.

Speaker 2: 14:40

Still, we have just become this mindset of I'm just kicking the can down the road. Our whole government owes trillions of dollars. They're not accountable, they're modeling it. We, as parents, say we're going to do something and we don't. We're not accountable. Our kids are watching. They see us not be accountable. This is the world we live in. There is an absolute void of accountability.

Speaker 2: 15:00

Now don't mistake the word for responsible, for accountable. If you go to work today, you've been responsible. You showed up at work, good job. But if you sit there the whole time and look at your Facebook page or you're rude and impatient with the coworkers or the customers that come in, if you don't do a thorough job and you don't care and you see something's wrong, you don't care. It's not your problem. That's not being accountable. They hired you to be an asset that brings value to their business and if you just exist in the chair at that space, that's responsible. You just showed up. Accountable is you own it. You own the best of your ability as you serve God through that job that you have. So I just don't think people are aware of the lack of accountability, and I think that's what's keeping us from being accountable. That's why I wrote the book. I mean, you think this would not you require a book, you can just say go be accountable. People don't know what that looks like.

Speaker 1: 15:52

You mentioned before about, you know, being that we're all, you know, all of us who are Christians will eventually be accountable to God. And then you know, the question I should ask you is so why are people not accountable? So who are we, you know, besides God? And for those who are not Christians, who may listen to this later, who should they be accountable to? I mean, do they, like I mentioned earlier about the accountability group or accountability people? You know you said that that doesn't always work out because people lie or people may not tell the truth. So who are they being accountable to?

Speaker 2: 16:36

Yourself. You need to figure out what your life is all about. I really teeter on a lot of awkwardness as I share this with people because I don't want it to be like a. I grew up in the seventies where there was this whole movement of just name it. Claim it and you know, if you feel good, do it. And and it was this whole thing about you know you, you can be good just just with inside of you.

Speaker 2: 17:00

And I'm saying that all these things based on the fact that you as a human are here on earth and you've got a small amount of time in the scope of history and eternity to do something here, and whatever you do will probably never be remembered. Even the biggest names famous most people. At some point those things will become nothing. You know Pharaoh did a pretty good job building some buildings, but you know that's other than that guy. There's going to be a lot of people who won't be remembered.

Speaker 2: 17:29

So what do you do with your life? And I think the opportunity is for us to be accountable to the reason that we exist. That's the core of it is. I'm going to be here for 60, 80, 90 years, I don't know but in the span of that. I have to deliver what I was created for. I'm here for a purpose, dorsey. You're here for a purpose and you should rock that purpose. Whatever that is, you have a lane that you're in. Be awesome at it, but you should be accountable to all the things that you are given.

Speaker 2: 18:04

I go back to the parable of the talents. That's in the Bible. Each of us has been given a talent, a certain amount a five, a three, a one. There's some different level of what you've been given in the journey you have. And whatever you have, you should be awesome at it because it was given to you and it was. The giver of that is giving it to you to steward, to take care of, and someday he's going to come back for that investment that's you and he wants to see a good return. Now, you don't have to believe all this stuff. I do, but you don't have to believe all this. But those of us who follow Jesus, this is what we're told that the master has given the servants this investment and he wants a good return, and it will come to pass that he will come back for his investment to see what you did with it. So you being accountable to you and who God created you to be for your purpose in life is all that matters.

Speaker 1: 18:56

You mentioned about the talent there. I'm not sure if it's a talent as much as it is a, you know, maybe a fruit of the spirit, but I like to encourage people and I like to inspire people and I remember telling a friend of mine, you know, last week or whatever it was, that I want to do that more. You know, I feel like I didn't lose it or I didn't, you know, but maybe I put it to the side and I want to do that again. I want to encourage people. I see somebody doing a great job. We come down I want to say, hey, that you're doing a great job, keep it up.

Speaker 1: 19:33

You know they grab with. You know, with they grab with. You know, with the shaming on Sunday to the youth that spoke on Friday night. You know that type of encouragement that I want to give to people, even to my co-workers at my job, who you know may not like being there, you know, for that day, or who are frustrated Okay, you know what, regardless of what you're going through today for that day or who are frustrated, okay, regardless of what you're going through today, you're doing a great job.

Speaker 2: 20:06

And Dorsey, nobody wants to be an encourager on their own. That comes from God. You know, these things that we do, that are nice the lack of a better word I would say honoring to God, those things that we desire to do, they're not of us, those are from the spirit of God, because, left to ourselves, I don't give a rip about other people. They want to be a baby about it. Go home, go find another job, get out of my face. But if you really have a desire to be encouraged, that comes from God. So, again, he has given you that skill, that talent, and you go use it to the best of your ability to bring glory and honor to his name. And each of us has some role, something that we do, that we can either do it okay or we can do it with awesomeness. And again, since you're going to be accountable to God for it, I vote for doing it with excellence and doing the best of your ability. Otherwise you waste that opportunity.

Speaker 1: 20:59

How do we own being accountable for our own mistakes?

Speaker 2: 21:07

Yeah, you know, no one knows what you really do. You know, a lot of the stuff we do in life is kind of secret. Heck, half the junk that derails me from my walk with the Lord is in my brain and no one's ever going to know that. And so, really, what it comes down to is vulnerability. Excuse me, if you want true accountability, you need to be a vulnerable, because vulnerability allows us to get help to be the best version of ourselves. If I don't tell you what my goal is, there's no way for you to know if I'm doing a good job of it or not, to encourage me, as you're really good at doing, or to challenge me if I'm getting derailed.

Speaker 2: 21:46

So a lot of times people don't let other people into their lives. They're the people who watch church at home. They're the people who sit in the very back row and the whole church is wide open, and they don't talk to people. They come in, they get out and they leave. I don't want people in my business. I don't want people to know what I'm doing, because I don't want people to tell me I'm not doing the right thing, and so we just kind of avoid people. But if you really want to be the best version of yourself. You got to tell somebody. You got to walk with other people. We have a life group at my church so we hang out with other people a few times a month outside of the church situation, so we can know each other and go. You and your wife seem to be arguing a lot lately what's going on, not to bust their chops, but to care for them and encourage them. And so I think if you want to really be the best version of yourself, you're going to have to be vulnerable, you're going to have to share with somebody else.

Speaker 2: 22:33

I recommend, at the very least, you write it down. That's why we created the satisfaction assessment. Go online, go to nobodycaresbookcom and you can take the assessment for free. And we don't charge you. We don't ask for your information, we just give it to you for free because we want people to be able to start the journey on their own. And then you write it down.

Speaker 2: 22:52

If you're really truly honest, how much do you value your relationship with God? How is your marriage today in comparison to what you thought it was going to be the day you got married? What about your kids? Is your relationship with your kids the thing you thought it would be when they were first born, or your finances or your career. Just write it down and score it honestly.

Speaker 2: 23:11

That's the first step. Now you've declared it to the world. Look, piece of paper I said this and now it's out there. It exists. And now, if you really want to have vulnerability and accountability, share it with someone. Say, look, here's my life, this is where I'm satisfied or not satisfied, it's totally up to you. You can say whatever you want, but if you show somebody now, it's not only spoken to the world and everyone, it's out in existence. But now you've shared it with someone, now you're being really vulnerable and now they can support you, encourage you. Hey, I have that same problem. Why don't we walk this together? It's what the body of Christ is all about. Right, we're supposed to come along with each other and support each other in the journey. I think that's what allows us to have real accountability.

Speaker 1: 23:52

Why do you think we blame, why do you think we make excuses and blame others or God for our own mistake and failure? Why do you think we do? Because we don't want to take accountability. That's so true, man.

Speaker 2: 24:14

I mean, these are like simple things, but the reality is, ever since you were a little kid, you blamed someone, you knocked something over. He did it, you know, or you make excuses. I didn't know that, I didn't know. I wasn't supposed to put the cat in the dryer. You, you know.

Speaker 2: 24:28

Whatever things you do as a kid, it's from the very beginning. No one has to teach us how to be bad, but we don't want to get punished, so we figure out a way to avoid accountability. We've been raised on this and so I think it's just. It is different to really truly think about life with the eyes of accountability. It changes everything I do. Again, it's not negative, it's not like, oh, I don't need this extra stress in my life, no, no, no. This is freedom and power and joy, because everything else you stay a victim. But when you look at something through the eyes of accountability, you're taking it. We say if you take accountability for everything in your life, you now have the power to change anything in your life, and I'm saying anything. There's nothing you can't do, especially those of us who are walking with Jesus. He says I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength, and so, whatever thing you think you got, that's too big, it's not. It just needs for you to step up and own it and begin the journey, and you might be working on it till the day you die, but it's still yours. You're not going to live a life as a victim. You're going to constantly be in this journey of whatever you got.

Speaker 2: 25:41

When I was young, it was getting through school. When I was older, it was finding a girl. When I was older than that, it was being married. Then it was starting my career. Then it was losing my job. I mean, there's always something. Wait till I get a house, then I'll be happy. Oh my gosh, I have a house Now I have to take care of it. Everything is gonna. There's always something out there, beyond your reach, that will make you happy. If you have this that's a lie you could be happy today. Happiness is fleeting. You can have joy today because you look at your life and say I am loved by the God of the universe. He created me exactly the way he wanted me to be and there's a purpose for my life that is unique to me.

Speaker 1: 26:21

Now get going, amen. Men seem to have a harder time being accountable to one another.

Speaker 2: 26:30

Why do you think that is? Yeah, I don't think men like being generally vulnerable. You know, I mean maybe it's stereotypical on my side, but the women in my life, like my beautiful wife Kathy, she's just genuine and real and tender and she'll meet some random dude somewhere and just start sharing her heart. She's just real. But if I meet some random dude somewhere and just start sharing her heart, she's just real. But if I meet some random dude somewhere, I'm trying to impress him, I want to look like I got my life together and so maybe that's that macho thing where you don't want to be vulnerable, you don't want to be real. But I think it holds us back from having the opportunity of community in the journey, since no one's going to hold me accountable. I don't need someone to do my job for me, but I do need someone to walk with me and encourage me and challenge me. But if they don't know what I'm struggling with, how do they support me? And I've also been in these accountability groups where guys get together every week and talk about all the mistakes they made oh, I looked at porn last week. Oh, yeah, I yelled at my wife again. And then, month after month, they come back. It's rinse and repeat. They're just telling the same stories of failure.

Speaker 2: 27:32

Stop being a victim. If you're looking at porn on your computer. Take your computer, bash it to a million pieces. What does the Bible say? If your hand makes you stumble, cut it out. If your eye makes you stumble, gouge it out. Is Jesus like some weirdo? He's saying just be that, be that extreme, cut out things that make you stumble.

Speaker 2: 27:49

So if you've got a problem with your computer, get rid of your computer. Oh, I need a job. Don't give me that. Don't tell me I can't. Tell me you won't. You're saying I won't.

Speaker 2: 27:59

That is a victim mindset when you say I can't. Oh, I need a computer for work. Get another job. If what you're doing is destroying your life, own it. Fix whatever you got to do, because at some point it's going to own you. And you'd say well, I can't take another job because I'll lose my income. Dude, well, when you get fired for doing something you shouldn't be doing, then you'll have to go work at Walmart anyway. So why not go work at Walmart now and adjust your lifestyle proactively and take the receipts when people leave and mark them with a pen, and then you're not looking at porn anymore. I think we have just become so comfortable with staying in the victim role, and if we as men don't man up and lead the way that God has called us to lead, we are throwing away the responsibility and opportunity that God gave us, and we're accountable for that.

Speaker 1: 28:50

Like you said, first we need to be accountable to God and then we need to be accountable to ourselves, but it can work in situations where we can be accountable to other people. We just need to know that. Hey, they may not always be telling us the truth.

Speaker 2: 29:11

I think the only danger with that, dorsey, is that we take the pressure and put it on them. Right, dorsey? You're my accountability partner, so I'm going to call you. You call me every week. You check in on me. I need you to be my accountability. I'm now putting the weight on you to do something for me, and so what it does is it kind of takes the pressure off of me to step up my game.

Speaker 2: 29:30

I'm not saying there's anything wrong with having a buddy who's an accountability partner. I'm just saying all you're going to do with them is be vulnerable about the work that you're going to do towards chasing the life that you really want. They do nothing for you. Well, that's not fair. They can absolutely pray for you, they can absolutely call you and check in, but it's totally on you to be vulnerable and real and honest about this. Otherwise it doesn't work. So I just feel like sometimes we put this burden on the accountability partner to somehow babysit us or save us from doing something wrong. It is not their job to do that. They can walk with you in the journey, but they are not your savior you in the journey, but they are not your savior.

Speaker 1: 30:13

Yeah, I can definitely see that and see where you're coming from with that. How do we start living victoriously and stop playing the victim brain game? So when?

Speaker 2: 30:22

you decide that the pain of where you are is worse than the pain of where you're going to go, you will change, and that's how we were in 2019. We were sick of the stress of debt and, as much as we loved our house it was beautiful, big home, movie theater upstairs, beautiful furniture for entertaining. It was wonderful we couldn't afford it and the pain of where we were was so miserable that we finally decided to change. So when you get to a point in your life where you say, look, I don't like living like this, I'm going to own this, then you begin the journey towards accountability. We describe it as like climbing a mountain that's what the whole book is structured like and the first base of the mountain is all those excuses that keep us as victims. But then you get to that place where you say, wait, nobody cares until I do, and so I'm going to now take this journey that I want to be on, that I've scored in my assessments and I'm going to look at it and I'm going to say, okay, here's the reality of where I'm at and when I'm going to start the journey of accountability. The first step to that is taking stock of where you're at. Acknowledge the reality. The second one is to embrace the suck we stalk of where you're at. Acknowledge the reality. The second one is to embrace the suck. We call it that on purpose because it's going to suck, because going through some of these hard things sucks when you change. Like selling my house sucked. I hated that. I didn't like selling my house. I loved it. Having to tell people that we were $90,000 in debt and we're trying to start over sucked but I had to own it and I'd rather have my journey suck going towards where I'm going than to stay as a victim and have it suck Because as a victim it's going to stay there forever. But when I go through the journey of accountability it's on its way out. So acknowledge reality, embrace the suck and then find a solution.

Speaker 2: 32:05

We knew our house had equity but we still had to sell it. We still had to go through that journey. We had to find a real estate agent. We had to move out a lot of our furniture into a temporary storage place to make our house look sellable. We had to go through tons of stuff we'd accumulated over the years that there was nowhere to put them in our new home. This new home is one third of the size of our old home. We couldn't take most of our furniture. It wouldn't fit here. We had to sell all of it for pennies on the dollar. So you go through the process, you sell it, you sell your house, you make the changes you're going to do and then you just make it happen. You work through the pieces and you own it till it's done. And that's what you do.

Speaker 1: 32:46

You mentioned the Earth New Times. Now Can you tell us a little bit more about your book and where people can get your book?

Speaker 2: 32:55

Yeah, our book is available at all the bookstores you can think of, like Barnes and Nobles and Walmart and Target and all that good stuff, and it's available on Amazon. We prefer you buy it from us at nobodycaresbookcom. And the reason we want you to buy it from us besides we make a few more bucks at it is the reality that you then become part of our community. We want to hear about you. We want you to take the assessment online. We want you to share your results with us, take a screenshot or send us the PDF and say here's my results, here's the journey I'm on. Tell us your story, we'll pray for you. Results here's the journey I'm on. Tell us your story, we'll pray for you. We want to encourage you. We'll send you emails. We'll keep in our distribution list. So we want to talk.

Speaker 2: 33:33

We want to build a community of people who are sharing the results of living a life of accountability. So we prefer you buy it from us that way. As far as your podcast, I created a special link that if you can go to nobodycarespodcom, then you can put in the code word DORSEY and then, if you put in the code word, I will mail you a copy of my book for free for the first two people who fill out that contact form, and I wanted to do that because I wanted you to be able to connect with some of your listeners and reward those loyal fans who stayed to the end of your podcast and give them a chance. If you really want the book and you're really going to read it and you're really going to apply it to your life, I will send you an autographed copy of our book and encourage you in your journey.

Speaker 1: 34:19

Awesome. Well, thank you so much for that. And one last question I like to ask my guests is can you give us one last encouragement for my listeners?

Speaker 2: 34:32

The thing that has been on my heart lately is don't be lazy. I don't think we think of ourselves as lazy. Remember responsible is doing something, but accountable is doing what is required, what is the thing you should be doing, and so don't be lazy. Lazy means you know you should do something, but you don't do it. The Bible says a sluggard craves for much and accomplishes nothing. And I think in my own life, one of the reasons why I don't have everything the way I want it is because I'm lazy. I know I should floss. I don't want to floss, I'm tired. Forget it. That's lazy.

Speaker 2: 35:06

I know I should eat three servings of vegetables a day. Ah, I know I should eat three servings of vegetables a day. Ah, that's too much work. I'll have a taco. That's lazy. I know I should be saving this much each month, yeah, but I'd rather go to the beach and do that. That's lazy. There's so many things that we do that we're just lazy about it, and the lazy man gets nothing. The lazy person ends up with whatever they get, and I don't want to get whatever I get. I want to get what I want, and what I want is a solid marriage, kids who love Jesus, friends that are there for me when I need them, great relationships in the business community and, most of all, a Lord who is pleased with the life that I've lived. So don't be lazy. Up your game, get it done.

Speaker 1: 35:49

Amen. Well, thank you, Robert, for coming on the show again today. We greatly appreciate having you.

Speaker 2: 35:57

It's been nice to talk with you, Dorsey.

Speaker 1: 36:04

Well, guys and girls, thank you so much for coming on and listening again today. I hope you are encouraged and inspired by what Robert had to say and please go and check out his website and his book. I hope you buy and pick it up. And please like and share this podcast and go and check out my website and my podcast and, until next time, have a great day. Bye-bye.